have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He told me they were just razor bumps!
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
