so that wasnt chicken after all
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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