i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
