theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Come share oat with me in your robe
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Randomize
