KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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