It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
