She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
