Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
