I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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