you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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