i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
