Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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