fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize
