Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
