i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
