All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Randomize
