thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
