I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
The Olympian is in my bed
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
