Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
