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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
