there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
