Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
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