Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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