fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
