I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Do vagina's smell?
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Randomize
