If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Fuck me I smell like cheese
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
