How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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