would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize