I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
