That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
