with your own penis?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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