My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
