He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
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