I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
