so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
