you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
