What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
