So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
