I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
His hands were made for my vagina.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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