I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize