Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
