Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
