Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
