u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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