I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
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