how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
She's the barista slut.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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