yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
