scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Those nachos came to me in a dream
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
