Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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