idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
How external is "for external use only"?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
